Why does Jim smell like vodka?

and other covid workplace questions

why does jim smell like vodka?

He used hand sanitizer.

Today's hand sanitizer scent varieties come in tequila, vodka, and gin.

He picked up bad habits during layoffs.

The transition back to work was hard on all of us, Jim. Check out the EAP.

He's responsibly disinfecting his area.

Jim's a great employee.

how do I greet my coworkers?

HIP BUMP!

Perhaps not HR approved, but all the cool kids are doing it.

The Air Five.

No need to watch elbows.

You don't.

Forget mustering a perky smile.

why does beth have powder on her face?

She's testing Glo Germ powder.

Using Glo Germ to develop safety protocols? Go, Beth go!

She used powdered gloves.

She's protecting herself and others from viral transmission.

She's joining Jim at the EAP.

We thought her productivity seemed a bit high.

Does that guy work here?

Yes, that's Jim.

Face masks can obscure everyone's appearance, we get it.

Better check if it's a customer.

Neither?

Call security? Wait, see if he needs a job.

should I come to work with the sniffles?

Absolutely not.

Nobody wants to clean your desk post-sniffles. Work from home, or don't come in.